Monday, April 10, 2006

Why I think 'Froot Loops' is better than 'Strawberry Cornflakes'

Here, I act as an advocate of Froott Loops fans a.k.a. Froot Loopers a.k.a. Froopies a.k.a. Frootzie Mctastics, will share some reasons, based on my in-depth research about Froot Loops, the greatest cereal made by the sharpest mind of a selected flock of Toucan bird deep in an African jungle.

Why I Think Froot Loops is better than Strawberry Cornflakes:

1. Because Froot Loops contains more fruit flavors than just strawberry.
2. Because in real life, assortment of fruits taste better than eating corn and strawberry together. Corn and Strawberry are never meant to be together. It's just weird.
3. Because colorful rings look better in milk than some (supposedly) oval corn chips with questionable edges and a sorry attempt to make it look purrty-er by adding shriveled, dry, strawberries.
4. Because there is a higher possibility that I will get some 'surprise' gift inside Froot Loop's box. One can't have too many spy kits or color-changing plastic spoons.
While cornflake use: "The gift inside is you." It could trick some customers into thinking: "oh...they have a figurine of myself? awesome!!" and then they'd buy 5 boxes of cornflakes thinking that they'll have a collection of 'me' doll and then found out later that what cornflakes meant was that the gift inside will be the 'thinner you' after eating cornflakes for 3 months straight. And then the customers will feel cheated and get depressed because they think that even Kellogg thought they're fat and then things just go downhill from there..
5. Another comment about 'the gift inside is you', I personally think that anybody who'd eat nothing but cereal for 3 months could be thin. However, gradually they will develop a longer snout, walk on their hands and foot, grow a tail, and won't be able to say anything but 'moo'..
6. Because cornflakes contains the word 'flaky' or 'flakey', which means: bizarre, freaky, and unreliable.
7. Because I like Toucan Birds.

Hmm..okay, that's all I got for now. For Corn Flakes fans, don't be upset. Today I'm just in the mood for Froot Loops. And I'm procrastinating.
If you're really upset, just let me know and next time I will tell you the reasons why Strawberry Cornflakes is better than Peanut Butter and Jelly..

Back to studying!

1 comment:

Mac said...

No comment, sumpah...